Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
