You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
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Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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