He kissed a someone with a penis
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Randomize
