I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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