Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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