At least make sure they are 18
Why
Define "chronic" masturbator.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
