my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize