Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
