...so i touched it.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
