I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
