Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
