You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
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