just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I would fuck him just for his dog
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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