I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
