she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I think I am morally bankrupt
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
