I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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