i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize