so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Someone came in the potted fern
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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