in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
