You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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