what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
sarcasm needs its own font
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
