talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
