yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
We need to feng shui this bitch.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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