So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
