i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
