my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
