In the future we'll all be gay
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
