She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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