I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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