Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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