Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize