An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
