whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
