He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
