I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
