you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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