What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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