You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
