So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
