Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm always down for nudity.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
