My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
