he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize
