I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
