that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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