alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
