me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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