why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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