dude i'm inner monologue high
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize