WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I can't turn off my feet"
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
