i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize