tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
