I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
